So for the first time in like years, I got to sleep in till ten o'clock. Yeah ten o'clock. Before I had kids I never got up earlier then ten. But now when kids wake up at seven all bright eyed and bushy tailed, you gotta wonder if you'll ever get any sleep. But today it all came together and man it felt good. Up until the phone call that woke me up.

I answered my cell phone and it was a guy on line asking for me. He sounded upset. Turns out he was all pissed off about me calling one of his relatives to pitch the short sale deal to him. I guess I said the word "foreclosure" in the message to the relative and it started a whole sh=t storm. He called me and was threatening to sue me and the company I use for skip tracing and all that stuff. But whatever. He has no grounds. The foreclosure is public record he can't do a thing. He just wanted to vent about his mortgage company not sending him a bill. So I called him back and told him all that and I promised not to call him if he wouldn't call me. So that was that. I got kind of worked up about it though. I was shaking after the the initial call. I guess cuz of the confrontation. I was kicking myself all day for what I should have said. I totally could have been more aggressive. But whatever.

I worked out today. I am back on track. I am trying to lift and get stronger as I have gained so much more weight in the recent months. So I am trying to change my diet and ease into the calorie burn.

I am back knocking on doors again. I have committed to knocking or calling on every foreclosure that comes through my territory. That should be well over 100 contacts. If I do that I should get five or so for August. Dohnnie already has like twelve. I don't know how he does it. Unbelievable.

So for more updates, Summer got called to be the Second Counselor in the Primary Presidency of our ward. I congratulated her on the achieving the promotion to Mormon middle management. Hey gotta love it.

I am going to a workshop http://www.lifetransitionsworkshops.com at the end of August. The first one since 1999. Its been awhile.

I had a good IM conversation with Erin tonight. We were talking about how much we miss Mom. Sasha was out in Provo putting flowers on the gravesite because he had a training in SLC. Made me miss her even more.

You know its funny, I just read at http://hayna.blogspot.com about her new found obsession of Blow Out on Bravo. I have to admit that I too share the obsession. As Summer and I were packing the house up we found ourselves drawn to the marathon. Would Jonathan fail at his business? Even though he's driving a MERCEDES?!?! But you can't blame the beautiful people for being part of the drama of doing hair. One of the more stressful jobs in the world (wink, wink).
 
Anyways, we got everything packed for our relocation. We pick up the truck and move down the block on the morrow so we are excited. Tomorrow I am going to start back on my work out plan and quest for a better lifestyle. NOT a diet, just a life change. I have been chewing on it mentally for a few months now but I think it is time. So without much ado I bid you adieu. Laters.

Ahhh, things are different now. This is the first post since the changes on the "dashboard". I suppose I'll see how it works now. So I don't know what to write. Summer is up in Jacksonville for her convention which might be a huge failure. She has sold exactly two books. Tomorrow is supposed to be a big day but I'm skeptical. You know starting your own business is such a tough task to handle. Especially with two little ones and a "darling" husband. So as you can probably expect the place is a mess right now...Cups everywhere, toys, pizza boxes, and all the like.
 
I lost a house today. Only one good property will be bought and sold from May. But that deal may be 40 large. So that is nice. Dohnnie said he'd give me a bonus if it went through.
 
I am thinking about starting to train again. I mean for real this time. I have gained so much weight from all the stress that I really believe I am a better person when I exercise 10 to 15 hours a week. But after that rationale I tend to wanna buy a really nice tri-bike on ebay and finance it!!! When that happpens I just think of Summer's voice and it all goes away.
 
Tomorrow I have a realtor walk-through for a house that I picked up a few weeks ago that was a mail away. These banks are getting greedy, they want money to bring the account current before they will allow you to try for a discount.  So whatever. Its fine if you have the cash. But some of us don't have that necessity.
 
Some more good news is that Summer's mother Suzanne is gonna take over the processing for me so I can just pursue houses, full time.
 
But thats enough for now laters.

I'm disgusted with myself. Yeah I just discovererd that I have gained all my weight back. Back when I decided to start losing weight again, Summer's grandma told me rudely, "you'll just gain it back". So here I am a year later, and I have gained it all back, and more. Right now I weigh 319 pounds. At one point before Christmas, I weighed 265. Thats fifty pounds in 6 months. Thats oh what like 8 pounds a month!!!Unbelievable. And its very simple why I gained it all back. Sedentary lifestyle and fast food. See Summer is not cooking as much anymore, we're stressed with our new life, we don't have very much money, and so we eat out...Chinese, pizza, and Mexican being our guilty pleasures. You see I am in the car a lot and worrying about money and getting more deeds and stuff. And don't you know I see MickeyDs pass by...hmmm I think I'll stop there and get myself a Double Quarter Pounder. You know I don't even enjoy it. Its tastes terrible to me. I don't seem to have any hope. You know I kid because I care but there is a sense of urgency here because I am a ticking time bomb for Heart Disease and high Cholesterol. Not good. My Mom died prematurely of Heart Disease and Dad has had two or three heart attacks. So there you go. I know what I have to do. I have already two times. Lose fifty to thirty pounds pronto. How do I do that?

1. Exercise my but off 10 to 15 hours a week.
2. Stop eating out, only eat in the house, NO FAST FOOD.
3. Cut down on fried and processed foods.

And so it goes. Last year this time, Erin was staying with us cuz we just got home with Jacob. And then I decided to dedicate myself to lose weight and run my first triathlon. Well I did that and now I am back to where I started. I remember I went out to run with Summer and I couldn't even run a mile without stopping. And now I think I am back to that point. But I did do an eighteen mile bike ride last week that wasn't too bad. But I am in the flat terrain of the Florida Peninsula. But anyway I am going to try and get back on track. Its a spiritual thing not just a physical or emotional thing. I am letting myself go because I cannot deal with the stress. And that sucks. So there you go. The veracity of that sentence really just hit me.

Well we're moving again. We don't have very much money right now and we have to move because Dohnnie is selling the house. He is pissed because the payoffs came back way high. Now we know why they couldn't sell the house before. So there you go. Now we are moving into a two bed two bath that we haven't been in since before we had Jacob. But now that the kiddies are used to sleeping the same room we will stay with the current setup. Its gonna suck changing our addresses on everything again. Such a pain.

But we did get some good news. Got two approval letters for short payoffs today. One deal is gonna make Dohnnie like somewhere around 44k. That is awesome. We'll make around seven grand off of it. That closes at the end of the month. So we got that going for us which is nice.

Anyway I am out of things to post about so laters.

My life is rated NC-17.
What is your life rated?

yep my life is nc-17 baby. But its "legal" cuz I be married. Awww yeah...

Better day today definitely. For the first time since I moved down here I actually got done everything I needed to get done in one day. Which is pretty sweet. It really feels great to see that whole to do list marked out. Funny how a little thing like that can give such a sense of accomplishment but it does.

Brevard county has blown up the last couple of days with all the LPS. I have fifteen doors to knock on tomorrow and a full day of short sales. And that is only one county! I have like seven other counties to get to. Nuts. I finally got my picture on my profile the way I want it thanks to jenna at her blog. Props to her. Thanks Jenna!!! Another sense of accomplishment. Gotta love it.

I can't help but be positive today. We are broke but we have promise and hope which is a good thing to have along with faith. Not to get sappy but we are following our dreams and there is something to be said for that. Some people don't have the cajones to do that. But we have to keep our end of bargain. And that was to be righteous and worthy. And that for us means paying tithing. We could have paid our tithing but we didn't and now we are broke. Coincendence? I think not. Anyway I feel sleep coming on.

this is the real better one. 

this is little bit better one 

You know I wonder whats going on with me sometimes. I have felt very angry and depressed today. Is that possible? Probably. I heard somewhere (on TV) that depression is just anger turned inside. Well thats me. I feel like my life right now is spinning out of control and I can't do a thing about it. Really that last statement is B.S. I am in complete control of my life and my actions but only those alone. So that means that I don't have an excuse right? You betcha.

I went on an 18 mile bike ride this morning. I rode to the Health Club and worked out then rode back. Yep pretty good. I felt wiped out all day. Took me a while to recover. I burned almost 1700 calories. Then I worked all day like from 10 till 8 tonight. Summy and I had an argument it sucked. You know we are both trying to start our businesses and we are both pretty stressed out and the kiddies are really having a hard time cuz they don't know whats going on and so on and so on. Its a vicious cycle really. So I have to bite my tongue and go apoligize and hope that she will apoligize too but there's not a darn thing I can do about it. Marriage can be the most wonderful and agonizing thing at the same time. Its all worth it of course its just these moments when you really want to just get a break. But thats for another discussion I spose.

Tomorrow is another day and I really can't wait to start over a whole new day to get this one over with.

I wish I had something cool to write. But I don't really. I had kind of a bad day today I guess. Dohnnie came over since he was taking Dad to the doc. He was all giddy and happy. He even gave me a hug. After that I really put myself in a bad mood. I went to work out with Summer and the kiddies later. The one thing I did do which was cool was I changed my own tire on my bike. No more charges at bike shops to change tubes when I can now do it myself. Amazing how simple it is but its a big step.

Sam won't go to bed. He is rebelling and is now taking his clothes off to get in his diaper only. He is taking the potty training thing at his own pace. Which is fine I spose cuz we are so busy with our businesses.

Today I felt like I really bad person cuz I don't spend more quality time with my kiddies and Summy. I just felt down today. Maybe tomorrow will be better. I have gained so much weight since I left Missouri it really is a shocker. I am back up around the weight I was when I working at Wal-Mart in Rolla right after we got married. Not a good time then. But we have committed to working out together and hopefully it all will come off by the fall. We shall see.

Anyway I'm tired so callin' it a night.

and my lovely wife....she'll kill me if she finds out I posted her picture on the net.. 

this is me looking rather haggard but hey waht can you do? Not much really.  

You know I have found a whole lotta of cool things in the blogging world. I have found other Mormons who blog just like I do. Actually pretty cool. Its been fun to read their comments on the world and stuff.

Well Dohnnie and I had a pow wow and we have decided that we need to have Summer help me with Short Sales after all. So that means that after she gets done with this Rehab on Northern Oak that she will become my gopher or Dohnnie's gopher for the short sales. Which is a really good thing because I can't do all this by myself and still get ten deeds a month. Just not possible.

So Dad declared that he wants "his" computer so I spent all the last three hours unplugging my computer from the front room and hooking the network back up in our master bed. I can't get the Lexmark printer to install. Its an old one that didn't have a XP printer driver for it. Thats what I get for spending fifty bucks at Wal-Mart for it. Its the only color we have so we got that going for us...which is nice. (think Caddyshack)

Tomorrow I start anew with an enlarged enthusiasism for this business. I am gonna hit all these counties on the east coast tomorrow. Oh yeah baby I am pumped!!! Right. Anyway I'm outtie.

We went to see the Terminal tonight and we saw Spiderman 2 last night. They're both pretty good but Spidey is better. Its nice to see movies again. We got paid too. My first big paycheck from HB Funding Inc. Very nice to be sure. Anyway laters.

You know I really feel overwhelmed right about now. I am so busy trying to process all these deals that I am really just overdoing it. And I am not getting what I need done done. Does that make sense? I don't know but I do know that I need to change something.

I get the feeling that Dohnnie doesn't have that much to do but I have too much to do. And now I dont know whats going on with all this stuff.

I am really frustrated. Dohnnie's deals were all supposed to close around a week ago and he is still waiting for the first one to fund. Really frustrating. I am worried that he is not gonna cash me out of my part of Santiago. So that sucks too.

He needs to hire an Assistant or something because I cannot do all this myself. It is just too much. I feel so disorganized and out of control. Plus I feel myself slipping away physically like I did at Wal-Mart. Dad's stuff doesn't help. We're moving him Friday. Or rather I am moving him Friday.

Anyway laters.

Haven't blogged in awhile. I have been reading more blogs then writing. But I have been busy. I found myself jealous of the "famous" bloggers. I wonder what they do to get noticed?

I got another house today. It is just a yes but I think I can get the deed if the wife is willing to cooperate. Dohnnie didn't get any proceeds from the closings so that means that there is no money until next week at the earliest. So that sucks. I worry about money. Big time. I wish I could worry about other superficial stuff. But right now I worry about where my kids are gonna eat. That sucks for a 25 yr old guy.

I need to start exercising again. Pretty crazy that I completed my first triathlon just a few weeks ago. Now I can barely run without getting out of breath.

Dad is moving out. Thank goodness. I really hate all the gossip that goes on in my family. It always gets back to me in one way or another. It really sucks.

Went to see Harry Potter tonight with Summy. She liked it and I thought it was okay. I would have preferred the Terminal but hey you gotta do what you gotta do. Anyway thats all for now. Laters.

Today was a busy day, I got a lot done with the Short Sales and only knocked on a few doors. But we got a good vacant in Cocoa and a lead on one in Orlando maybe tomorrow.

Dennis is doing pretty good. He is good with people but he struggles with the computer stuff. But I dont know if he realizes that he doesn't need to the computer stuff to succeed at this stuff.

They might move down here, but Dohnnie is not having any part of it. Summer wants me to talk to him to see if we can work something out but who knows whether that will work or not. He wants to do it for sure. But Dohnnie is not so sure.

Dohnnie got served with papers today from Lena. Surprising really, she wasn't as dumb as she lead us to believe. Or at least her mother isn't as dumb. Whatever. She's a wench.

Summer is getting ready for FBAH to open up and she is psyched.

Not working out yet but I am planning joining the gym here first chance I get. So that'll be nice. Hopefully some of these deals will go through and get some cash flowing. I am worried that Dohnnie is gonna lose all of his money to his wonderful soon to be ex-wife. We'll see.

We didn't go to church today. Erin was supposed to come early for a pow wow to deal with Dad but she didnt get her until later in the morning. We went ahead and got most of everything straight about Dad. He is going to sign the power of attorney with all of us on it. And he is going to leave all the rest of the money from his life insurance to Megan to help her with school. Kind of surprising.

He is not really there. He kept saying that we all were from Fort Worth Texas when we're not. He even said that the computer in the living room was a TV that he couldn't get to work right.

I had a mini-panic attack tonight trying to deal with the kiddies and think about what is gonna happen with Dad. I am responsible for my children but not for Dad. But not really. Strange that I have to deal with all of this. Plus we have no money to speak of. We spent over a hundred bucks just on his prescriptions alone. Come Tuesday morning we willl be overdrawn again. And we are not spending a lot of money just babysitter and food. We are not even paying rent yet. So all of these worries really bother me. Plus I am getting fat again. I haven't worked out in weeks. Really starting to get on my nerves. I almost just wanna go sign up at Health-First just so I can go and work off some this stuff. Right now I am just eating it away...good example, I ate a whole bag of Oreo cookies tonight with milk.

Summer's Dad is coming tomorrow. That should be real fun. I mean he is way too stupid to do all this stuff. He doesn't get this stuff. You have to understand how to work computers and he doesn't get it. He'll just start talking about how he is from the Industrial Revolution and we are from the Technology Revolution. Like that is gonna get him anywhere. Anyway I'm ranting.

Well Dad had his heart catheter today. He had five grafts in 94 and now two of them are completely blocked and one is partly blocked. Two are clear. He is doing a lot better tonight. He is real emotional he says that he saw Mom a few times and she was herself not a willowy angel or anything.

Summer thinks it might be a sign that he is going to die soon. I don't know. One I do know is that if he only has two grafts open to his heart it is only a matter of time before he has a heart attack and dies along with the other stuff. Unbelieveable really. Both of my parents will probably die before I am thirty. I shouldn't be selfish and should think about what he is going through. His life is almost over. I can't imagine all the regrets and wishes he still might have as he stares death in the face. I think he understands what he is up against. He looks fearful in the face tonight. He has told Erin and Summer that he loves them already. He is concerned about the kiddies. If something happens now the kids might not remember their grandpa.

I haven't worked out since I got here. Only a couple of bike rides one that left me with a flat tire. I really am hoping that the title is clear on the Sebastian property so that we can refinance and we can get some cash out. That would be so nice. Not to have worry about money right now.

If Dad recovers he might not be able to do as much as before. And that wasn't much then. I wonder if he would be eligible for hospice care. That might be an option even though he does not a "terminal" illness. Who knows.

All I know is that I gotta make some changes. I am overweight and subject to emotional eating. I will end up like Dad and Mom and Dohnnie. So I need to fix things. I just don't know how to stop right now. I feel like I have no control. And I guess I don't really. Just over my own decisions. Whatever. I am done. Erin comes down tomorrow so we'll see how that goes.